Three Ways to Face Your Fears With Courage.

Here are a few techniques to help you build your courage and face your fears.

1. Put all remote possibilities out of your mind: Don’t worry about things you have no control over. Don’t spend your time thinking about all of the bad things that might happen to you. Don’t spend your time plotting and planning ways to make sure these things will never happen. 

2. Face your fears before you start something: Imagine difficult situations before they occur. Make a list of the worst that could happen, and you’ll probably see that the situation is not so bad after all.

A friend of mine lost everything a few years back—her home, cars, possessions, antiques, art, jewelry and credit. She lost it all. Now, on her way back up, whenever she’s faced with a tough decision, she asks herself, 'What’s the worst that can happen?' And guess what, she’s already been through the worst and she survived. It’s not an issue anymore.

You don’t have to lose everything to lose that particular fear. But once you face your fear, you can move on. Once you’ve figured out the worst that could possibly happen, you’ll see that you have the inner strength to deal with it if the worst scenario comes about. And here’s the best part: If you’ve looked at the possibilities beforehand, you’ll probably never be faced with the situation at all. Why? Because you’ve already been through it. By contemplating what might happen, you’ve charted your course to ensure that it doesn’t. 

3. Imagine the alternative: Picture the result of giving into your fears. Really feel the cost of being ruled by fear; then really feel the benefits of courageously following your ambition. Carefully weigh the two and see the difference. If you’ve been invited to address your national sales convention and are scared to death of public speaking, what should you do? You could decline the invitation, knowing full well that your fears are holding you back. Or you could take some classes, read some books, practice with a friend. See yourself stepping into a whole new league. You’ll be accepting the opportunity to gain more notoriety in your field. And you’ll be increasing your opportunities for future success.

Once again, it’s your choice. Be fueled by your fears, or face your fears. It all depends on how badly you want something. It all depends on how you choose to live your life; do you always want to be afraid of taking the next step, or do you want to build your courage and open the doors of opportunity? I know what my answer would be.

Courtesy: Jim Rohn.

Realistic Secrets of Success.

This morning, I got an e-mail from a self-described well-educated, young urban professional who would like to build on his current great life’s foundation. He wanted my “blunt” opinion on what I believed to constitute the secrets of success in life. And he suggested that I posted the opinion on my blog so that others, like him, could also benefit.

In my humble opinion and in a nutshell, success in life entails either one or both of two factors. On the one hand, success can come from destiny. That is why some individuals (in spite of little efforts on their parts) are leading successful lives. By some divine reasons, they are always at the right place, at the right time. And, on the other hand, success can arise as the product of a great personal strategic plan. In most cases, this comprises of a good education, dedication and hard work.

In addition, success from either or both of these two factors can be accelerated and strengthened. To do this, all you have to do is surround yourself with successful or potentially-successful people. They will be the wind beneath your wings. The saying about birds of the same feathers flocking together (for good or for bad) can easily be applied here. It is your responsibility, as an individual, to painstakingly choose friends who inspire, motivate or challenge you to rise above your potentials. If the majority of your friends are people whose life history is all about failures in relationships, marriages, careers, finances, social graces and other life’s accomplishments, you are in trouble. You’ll be like the victim of a capsized boat who struggles to swim above water while some haters, out of spite, keep pulling him/her down. In your pursuit of success, frustrated and miserable friends or associates can never be happy for you. And it does not matter if their faces are constantly plastered with smiles each time they see you. So, here is the bottom-line: Choose your friends wisely if you want to be successful in life!

To Forgive and Forget? Nothing Short of a Mission Impossible.

Imagine getting offended by someone who, after a while, realizes their error and pleads for forgiveness. For many of us who have found ourselves in this type of situation, forgiveness is not a problem. Very often however, the offending person will not only ask for forgiveness. They will most likely ask that we “forgive and forget”. And this is where the problem arises. Yes, we tend to agree. But do we really ever forget? In reality, this is easier said than done. A brain has no eraser and neither does it have a delete button. Some things will just refuse to go away, depending on the hurts that arise from them.

The Yoruba people of southwestern Nigeria have a saying to the effect, “Spoken words are like eggs. Once they fall off from a mouth, they can’t be repackaged into their previous shapes.” Now, actions or spoken words that inflict physical or emotional pain cannot, in all reality, be expected to go away. The aggrieved party only has to see the scar or remember the emotional anguish to feel offended all over again.

Therefore, the only anti-dote to this type of situation is for us all to be mindful of what we do or say in moments of anger. And each time we do mess up, as imperfect mortals, the best we can hope for is forgiveness. Asking the aggrieved parties to forget is akin to asking them to wipe off a part of their brains. This is a “Mission Impossible”.

A Woman is Behind Every Successful Man.

How Not to Get Your Ass Kicked by the Police.

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Celebrities and Their Constant Flights From Reality.

Robin Williams is once again at a rehab facility. But guess what? This time, he is said to be "fine-tuning” his sobriety. For God’s sake, when did a man's body start needing "fine-tuning" like an automobile? Who does the man think he is deceiving? 

Why do most celebrities often consider themselves as superhuman, beyond the usual problems that everyone else is confronted with? What makes them think they are supposed to be immune to human tribulations? And are they more human than the rest of us just because they do some “make-believe” stuff in movies or sing some songs on records?

Otherwise, why will a whole lot of celebrities resort ignorantly and continually to heroin, crack cocaine, weeds and other crazy substances? Unfortunately for the stupid celebrities, drug abuses can only keep them "high" for a short period of time. Those of them who try to go on "long trips" from reality always end up overdosing and waking up in the world beyond.

Personally, this is all the more reason why I keep thanking God every waking moment for my normal life. Mine is a life filled with reality…the good, the bad and the ugly sides of life. Come to think of it, without these realities there was no way I could have grown wise and confident enough to call myself a man, a husband and a parent!

For Those Unrealistically or "Crazily" in Love.

The Whispers - In The Raw Official Video.

In the raw,
Don't choose too fast
You can't judge a book by it's cover
Make sure that what you see is what you get
And read between the lines

Don't place too much faith
In someone else's reputation
Watch closely, they might be just a shadow
Of the person they're supposed to be

(In the raw)
Just can't fake it
Gonna see what you're made of
(In the raw)
I can't change it
Everybody's got their own way

In the raw
Girl, you look at me
But only see what's on the surface
And I might just be what you expect of me
There's that possibility
Just strip away your thought
And only speak what's on your mind
'Cause whatever I tell you
You know it's from the heart
And that's the bottom line

(In the raw)
Just can't fake it
Gonna see what you're made of

(In the raw)
I can't change it
Everybody's got their own way

In the raw
There's nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
From what you really are inside
You never gain from tellin' lies
The truth wears no disguise

(In the raw)
That's the only way to find out

(In the raw)
Some try their luck at love for years
They waste their time and so many tears
To make sure love's on solid ground
You've got to break it down

(In the raw)
That's the only way to find out, oh, oh, ooh
(In the raw)
So let's break it down to the real thing...